The Alimony Trap: Enslavement for Women Too

In my article on Heather Mills below, I discuss how women drain men of unearned and undeserved funds through alimony. But men are not the only victims of this form of post-marital entrapment. The number of men receiving alimony from women is on the rise. And it may rise further as women become the primary wage earners in many marriages.

John David Castellanos, a former star from the soap opera "The Young and the Restless," is one of the these men. He gets $9,000 a month from his ex-wife. Joan Lunden's ex-husband received $18,000 a month. A non-celebrity shop foreman syphons $40,000 a year off of his marketing executive ex so he can maintain his antique cars.

"I don't understand why someone becomes your financial responsibility just because you married them," said Mr. Castellanos' ex. Joan Lunden also commented when she received her alimony court order, "Why the courts don't tell a husband, who has been living off his wife, to go out and get a job is beyond my comprehension." In the case of the shop foreman, he has a job but he still makes less than his ex and therefore is entitled.

Alimony is not child support. It is the money handed to the lower-earning ex-spouse. It is court ordered and can go on for years. It is one of the most miserable consequences of a wrecked marriage. It is also one of the biggest reasons to take the subject of mating very seriously.

Child support is understandable, but alimony abuse is a manifestation of greed. If the outcome of a "love-match" is financial gouging over many years, it s nothing more than enslavement.

In my book, The Dirty Seven: Ladies Beware, I discuss a category of men whose sole purpose is to find a woman to parasitize. He is the YAPpie, the most abundant category of men on the dating scene. The YAPpie and OLman, another category in the book, drain a woman financially and emotionally before they move on to their next victims.

Romantic dreams can turn into sickening nightmares as you write out the monthly alimony check to the man who was once your husband.

Hollywood Marriages: Short and Sweet?

National Public Radio New Orleans interviewed me soon after Renee Zellweger and Kenny Chesney got married, oh so romantically, on the beach. NPR asked me if I thought the marriage would last. I said, “No. They don’t know each other well enough. They haven’t spent enough time together. Between his gigs and her films, they saw each other a total of six time before their marriage.”

The interviewer was not happy with my answer. He said something to this effect: Kenny is a nice guy and she seemed nice. So what would be the problem? I reiterated, “They do not know each other long enough. Marriage is not a movie-set ceremony on a beach between ‘nice’ people and that’s the end of the story. You have to be able to live with that person on a daily basis.”

Now, of course, we know that the marriage was annulled and lasted only four months. She didn’t know he had certain sexual preferences. This is more common that you would think. I devote a chapter in my book, The Dirty Seven: Ladies Beware to GuyMan. GuyMan is one of the seven categories of men on the dating scene that cannot sustain a loving, complete relationship. In this case, GuyMan is the gay guy who has not accepted his gayness and desires to appear straight. Then, one day, his wife come home early from work and finds him in bed with the pool guy.

Hollywood marriages are laughable because of their short duration and mammoth price tags. Let’s not call them marriages. Let’s call them publicity stunts to keep stars, and d-listers alike, in the headlines. They are impulses of the moment turned into cinematic dream processions and displays of opulence.

Now we have the recent break-up of Pamela Anderson, after her recent 3-month marriage. We have had Britney’s famous 55-hour marriage. J-Lo’s previous 10-month marriage. Drew Barrymore and Tom Green’s 5-month marriage. Lisa Marie Presley and Nicholas Cage’s marriage that lasted 3 months. Cher and Greg Allman’s marriage lasted a total of 9 days. They tied with Carmen Electra and Dennis Rodman, whose marriage also endured for a whopping 9 days as well. However, the prize goes to Robin Givens and her tennis instructor, whose marriage came to an end on the same day they got hitched.